Wednesday, January 30, 2013

The rubbish that spammers write

It is easy to criticise people who send spam emails. They are probably written in a hurry and by people who don't have English as their mother tongue.

But there is also a part of me that likes to read them and to get a little amusement at the same time. I therefore thought I would share some snippets of real emails that I have been sent in the past... so you could smile as well. These aren't all just examples of bad grammar; some are factually incorrect and others just plain absurd.

We provides Guaranteed first page ranking in Google.
You have to say this with a pirate accent. But more importantly... any agency that offers to guarantee you a first page listing on Google is either lying or using black hat SEO techniques.

We use 100% white hat stuff.
Made out of stuffed white hats one assumes. Aside from the unprofessional approach, any SEO agency that isn't prepared to share a little more of their methodology might well have something to hide.

Hello Dear, How are you doing
I'm fine, thanks for asking. Being over familiar in email correspondence to someone you don't know is just as bad as being too stuffy and stiff to those you do.

This is not A spam please
ReAlly? Nothing says "this is spam" like an email subject line saying it is not.

So come on, has anyone else got any funny / cringe-worth examples?

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